When I first published the new list for 2012, many readers were quick to point out that its content is a bit more mature than last year’s. This adjustment was intentional; after all, I’m 16 going on 17 and burning the candle at both ends. This list item falls in that evocative, borderline-licentious category, and for good reason. Before reading any further, please note that there is some content that is pretty PG-13+. You’ve been warned.
Number one-oh-one was added to the list out of pure, unadulterated curiosity. I had heard about random chat generators such as Chatroulette and Omegle before, which are basically websites that invite people from all over the world to be randomly paired in web-based conversation. These chat rooms are infamous for celebrity sightings, pranks, and perverts, despite the fact that they are pretty much open to all ages. Bearing this in mind, I proceeded with a cautious open mind.
After experiencing connection issues with Chatroulette, I made my way over to another one of the many websites available, Omegle. With the click of a button, I was patched through, only to find myself looking straight at an occupied pair of men’s underwear. Feeling visually assaulted, I blindly slammed the escape button of my keyboard until I was assured the image was gone. Little did I know, the connection was set to restart with a new person within three seconds… as soon as I opened my eyes again, I found yet another male groin, this one laying sideways and a little more excited. The process of crying out in horror as I scrambled to find my exit key repeated… again… and again… and again. The prude in me was on the verge of aborting the mission altogether, until I was finally matched up with the actual face of an actual person, allowing me to literally breath a sigh of relief. Right off the bat, he told me he was going to try to make me laugh. The following screencap depicts his attempt:
To my surprise, our conversation ended up lasting an hour, regardless of the fact that we were deprived of sound. I learned that his name is Caleb, a 17-year old kid from Scotland. When he wasn’t trying to shower me with unnecessary flattery, we talked about typical teenager things: summer plans, phones, jokes, romantic interests… and then the conversation took a turn for the obscene. No, I do not want to see your private parts, no matter how much you respect women, but thank you for at least having the decency to ask unlike all of the others.
I would not recommend this list item to my younger followers by any means. Just don’t do it, okay? Save your innocence while you can. However, it was a fun way to kill an hour and meet someone new, so I just might give it another go. Meanwhile, the world just keeps getting smaller…
Love & Summer,
Update: Upon reading this post, my mother made it quite clear that this list item is much too inappropriate. Parental disapproval? I must be doing something right (;